Can I Change It?

A game about what I can fix, when to ask for help — and what can stay.

Sometimes things aren’t how I like them.

Can I change it? Do I need help? Can it stay?

Let’s find out!

For grown-ups

The idea

A child who notices something is different often goes straight to “so I have to change it”. This game puts one question in between: is this mine to change, do I need help, or can it stay? The goal is not to teach a child to accept everything. Some things really do want fixing — a shoe on the wrong foot, water on the floor — and asking for help is an action, not giving up.

Ask

“Is it yours to change? Does anyone need help? Can it stay like that?”

How to use it

Play it on a calm day, not in the middle of the hard moment.
“Let’s play!” is six short steps, easier ones first. Each round is a new mix.
Some situations have more than one sensible answer. Tying your own lace and asking for help with it are both fine, and the game says so.
If a choice doesn’t fit, the game says why and lets your child try another. There is nothing to correct.

Words to use at home

“You noticed something is different.”
“Is it yours to change?”
“Does anyone need help? Is it safe?”
“Can it stay like that?”
“If you can’t change that part, what CAN you do?”

Keep it to one question at a time. When your child is very upset, comfort first and save the questions for later.

How it fits with the others

Expected vs Different — noticing: “I expected this, but that happened.”
Can I Change It? — deciding: “Is this mine to change?”
What’s in My Control? — sorting the parts: “Which bits can I choose?”
It Changed — What Can I Do? — acting: “It changed. What can I do now?”

Good to know

Nothing is scored, timed or saved. Feelings are asked about, never graded.
The reasons are about ownership, safety, fairness and other people’s choices — never “because a grown-up said so”. Your child is always allowed to ask why.
Safety situations — broken glass, a blocked exit, a stranger — are never “it can stay”. They are always “tell a grown-up”.
This is an educational resource, not therapy or medical advice.

The situations

My shoe is on the wrong foot.
My T-shirt is on backwards.
My shoelace came undone.
My bag is open. My things could fall out.
My Lego model fell apart.
My puzzle piece is upside down. It won’t fit.
My book is upside down.
My toy dinosaur is facing the wall. I want it to face me.
I made a mark on my drawing. I want to rub it out.
My pencil is blunt. It’s hard to write.
My tablet is too loud for my ears.
My blanket feels scratchy.
I’m building a rainbow tower. I put two blocks the other way round.
My water bottle lid is open.
My coat sleeve is inside out. My arm won’t go in.
My sock is all bunched up inside my shoe.
The peas are touching my potato. I don’t like that.
I feel cold in class. My jumper is in my bag.
My pencil broke. I need it for my work.
I can’t find my school bag.
It’s lunchtime. My lunchbox isn’t in my bag.
My jacket zip is stuck.
Another child picked up my bag by mistake.
The chair I’m sitting on is too far from the table.
I spilled a little water on my desk. There’s a cloth next to me.
My snack wrapper fell on the floor.
I washed my hands. The tap is still running.
One book on the class shelf is upside down.
The class poster is a bit crooked.
The door usually has the green cushion. Today it has the red cushion.
The tables in our classroom have been moved around.
The wall display has new pictures. I liked the old ones.
The class clock is on a different wall now.
The toy shelf fell over. Toys are all over the floor.
My chair is wobbly. One leg looks broken.
I want to move the plant on the teacher’s desk.
My friend’s Lego tower isn’t the same on both sides.
My friend’s tower fell. They asked me to help fix it.
My friend drew the sky green.
My brother lined up his toys differently from how I would.
Another child doesn’t want to share their own teddy.
The couch at my friend’s house is different from ours.
My friend picked the blue game piece. Blue is my favourite.
My friend wants to draw instead of playing Lego.
Someone is sitting in the chair I like. There are no name cards today.
Someone is sitting in my seat. It has my name card on it.
Someone is on the swing I like.
My sister wants to watch a different show from me.
My teacher is wearing a different jumper today.
My friend feels sad. I want them to be happy right now.
Another child keeps taking my toy car.
Someone spilled water on the floor. Someone could slip.
A glass broke on the kitchen floor.
A chair is in front of the door we use for fire drills.
The smoke alarm is beeping.
A grown-up I don’t know asks me to go with them.
The slide has a sharp, broken bit.
My friend fell over and is crying.
My tummy feels sick.
We usually go the same way to school. Today we’re going a different road.
My favourite activity is missing from the timetable. I don’t know why.
The timer says my game time is finished.
We usually do maths first. Today we’re doing reading first.
My grown-up parked the car in a different spot today.
I usually have the blue cup. Today I got the yellow cup.
My favourite cereal has a new box.
The shop moved the toys to a different aisle.

More from Roo Bloom

67 everyday situations. Nothing is scored and nothing is saved. This is an educational resource, not therapy or medical advice.