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Someone Else Goes First

Roo Bloom · Social Stories · roobloom.com

  1. We line upAt school, we line up at the door to go outside.
  2. My friend is firstToday my friend is the line leader, not me.
  3. I might feel disappointedI might feel disappointed, cross or jealous.
  4. Turns go roundBeing first is a turn, and turns go round.
  5. Helping my body in lineI can help my body while I stand in my place.

    I could try… Squeeze my hands, then let go · Count slowly · Hold my calm-down thing

  6. I can ask whenI can ask my teacher when it will be my turn.

    I can say: “When can I be first?”

  7. We all get thereNot being first doesn’t mean I miss out.
  8. Games have turns tooIn a board game, someone goes first too. Today it’s my friend.
  9. I can get readyI can watch my friend’s turn and get my piece ready.
  10. It gets easierSometimes I’m first, sometimes I’m not. It gets easier.
  11. I am learningI am learning that turns go round, and I can wait for mine.

I can remember

  • It’s okay to want to be first.
  • Turns go round.
  • I can ask when my turn is.
  • First or last, I still get to join in.
For grown-ups

What this story teaches

That being first is a turn which goes round, that wanting to be first is a real feeling, and what to do with it: help the body, ask when my turn is, and join in anyway.

When to use it

  • If lining up, or a line-leader roster, is a hard part of the school day.
  • Before playing a board game with a sibling or friend.
  • After a day your child went second and managed it, to name what they did.

For this story

  • Make the rota visible: a line-leader chart or a written list of whose turn it is makes “when” concrete.
  • Try saying “You’re second” rather than “You’re not first” — it names a real place in the line.
  • Share this story with your child’s teacher so the same words are used at school.

How to use it

  • Read it together on a calm day, not mid-meltdown. In the hard moment itself, fewer words help more: stay close, keep everyone safe, and save the story for later.
  • Read it again just before a tricky moment you can see coming: on the way to the park, the night before a haircut.
  • Make it fit your child: skip pages, stop when they’ve had enough, swap a detail as you read so it matches your child’s day, or read only the “I can remember” card.
  • Add your child’s first name on the story’s opening page and it appears in a line or two. The name stays in this browser and is never sent anywhere.
  • Use the story’s words in real life (“No means not right now”), and model them when you hear “no” too.
  • Notice tries, not perfect calm. Big feelings are allowed; the story is about what to do with them.

Good to know

  • These stories are for everyday disappointments and changes. They never mean a child should put up with pain, fear, unsafe touch, bullying or anything that hurts — telling a trusted adult is always the right answer there.
  • Nothing here asks a child to make eye contact, hug anyone — family included — stop stimming or stop crying. Crying and moving are ways bodies cope, and headphones or a break are always allowed.
  • Where a story says a grown-up will do something — stop when a hand goes up, give a warning, keep a “later” spot — make sure it really happens, or change that page. A signal that isn’t honoured teaches a child their words don’t work.
  • The aim is understanding and choices, not a quiet or compliant child. Asking “why?”, saying no to touch and disagreeing in words are skills to welcome.
  • Visual stories help many children and not every child. Adapt, skip or change any page. This is an educational resource, not therapy or medical advice.