A Friend Chooses a Different Game
Roo Bloom · Social Stories · roobloom.com
- I want to buildMy friend comes over. I want to build a block tower.
- My friend wants a puzzleMy friend says, “Let’s do the puzzle instead.”
- I might feel stuckI might feel disappointed, cross or stuck.
- My friend has ideas tooMy friend has ideas too. Friends can take turns choosing.
- Helping my bodyI can help my body feel less stuck.
I could try… Squeeze my hands, then let go · Move my body — stretch or jump · Have a drink of water · Hug a cushion
- I can suggest turnsI can ask if we can take turns.
I can say: “Puzzle first, then my tower?”
- I can try their gameI can try my friend’s game. It might be fun!
- Then it’s my turnNext, it’s my turn to choose. We build my tower!
- Or play my game for a bitOr I can build on my own for a bit, then join my friend.
- My ideas matter tooTrying my friend’s game doesn’t mean my idea isn’t important.
- I am learningI am learning to share the choosing with my friends.
I can remember
- It’s okay to feel disappointed.
- Friends can take turns choosing.
- I can try my friend’s game.
- I can play my game for a bit.
- My ideas matter too.
For grown-ups
What this story teaches
That friends have their own ideas about what to play, that feeling disappointed about it is allowed, and three things to try: take turns choosing, try the friend’s game, or play your own game for a while and join in later.
When to use it
- Before a playdate, especially at your house with your child’s own toys.
- After a play session ended in a disagreement about what to play.
- When your child finds it hard to let go of a plan they had in mind.
For this story
- A visible turn-taker helps: a sand timer, or “your pick, then my pick” said out loud before play starts.
- Playing alongside, not together, for a few minutes is a real option, not a failure.
- Model it yourself: “I wanted to play cards, but let’s try your game first.”
How to use it
- Read it together on a calm day, not mid-meltdown. In the hard moment itself, fewer words help more: stay close, keep everyone safe, and save the story for later.
- Read it again just before a tricky moment you can see coming: on the way to the park, the night before a haircut.
- Make it fit your child: skip pages, stop when they’ve had enough, swap a detail as you read so it matches your child’s day, or read only the “I can remember” card.
- Add your child’s first name on the story’s opening page and it appears in a line or two. The name stays in this browser and is never sent anywhere.
- Use the story’s words in real life (“No means not right now”), and model them when you hear “no” too.
- Notice tries, not perfect calm. Big feelings are allowed; the story is about what to do with them.
Good to know
- These stories are for everyday disappointments and changes. They never mean a child should put up with pain, fear, unsafe touch, bullying or anything that hurts — telling a trusted adult is always the right answer there.
- Nothing here asks a child to make eye contact, hug anyone — family included — stop stimming or stop crying. Crying and moving are ways bodies cope, and headphones or a break are always allowed.
- Where a story says a grown-up will do something — stop when a hand goes up, give a warning, keep a “later” spot — make sure it really happens, or change that page. A signal that isn’t honoured teaches a child their words don’t work.
- The aim is understanding and choices, not a quiet or compliant child. Asking “why?”, saying no to touch and disagreeing in words are skills to welcome.
- Visual stories help many children and not every child. Adapt, skip or change any page. This is an educational resource, not therapy or medical advice.