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When Plans Change

Roo Bloom · Social Stories · roobloom.com

  1. I expected DadI thought Dad was picking me up from school.
  2. Grandma is hereToday Grandma is here instead.
  3. I might feel surprisedI might feel surprised, worried or disappointed.
  4. Giving my body a momentI can give my body a moment to catch up.

    I could try… Take slow breaths · Squeeze my hands, then let go · Count slowly · Hold my calm-down thing

  5. I can askI can ask what happened.

    I can say: “Where is Dad?”

  6. Grandma can explainGrandma can tell me what happened.
  7. Usually nothing is wrongA change of plan usually doesn’t mean something is wrong.
  8. I can carry onI can get into Grandma’s car and carry on with my afternoon.
  9. Thinking about what’s nextI can think about what comes next.
  10. Changes get easierEach time a plan changes, I get a little more practice.
  11. I can be flexibleI can be flexible, even when it feels hard.

I can remember

  • It’s okay to feel surprised.
  • I can ask what happened.
  • I can listen to the new plan.
  • Plans change, and I can too.
For grown-ups

What this story teaches

That a change of plan can feel surprising or upsetting, that it usually has an ordinary reason, and what to do: give the body a moment, ask what happened, listen to the new plan, and carry on.

When to use it

  • Before a day you know will be different — a new pick-up, a cancelled class.
  • After a change went well, to name what your child did.
  • When your child finds surprises hard, as a regular read on calm days.

For this story

  • Warn about changes as early as you honestly can, and say what stays the same.
  • Tell your child who is collecting them, even if it’s the usual person.
  • “That’s different to what you expected” names it without saying it’s a problem.

How to use it

  • Read it together on a calm day, not mid-meltdown. In the hard moment itself, fewer words help more: stay close, keep everyone safe, and save the story for later.
  • Read it again just before a tricky moment you can see coming: on the way to the park, the night before a haircut.
  • Make it fit your child: skip pages, stop when they’ve had enough, swap a detail as you read so it matches your child’s day, or read only the “I can remember” card.
  • Add your child’s first name on the story’s opening page and it appears in a line or two. The name stays in this browser and is never sent anywhere.
  • Use the story’s words in real life (“No means not right now”), and model them when you hear “no” too.
  • Notice tries, not perfect calm. Big feelings are allowed; the story is about what to do with them.

Good to know

  • These stories are for everyday disappointments and changes. They never mean a child should put up with pain, fear, unsafe touch, bullying or anything that hurts — telling a trusted adult is always the right answer there.
  • Nothing here asks a child to make eye contact, hug anyone — family included — stop stimming or stop crying. Crying and moving are ways bodies cope, and headphones or a break are always allowed.
  • Where a story says a grown-up will do something — stop when a hand goes up, give a warning, keep a “later” spot — make sure it really happens, or change that page. A signal that isn’t honoured teaches a child their words don’t work.
  • The aim is understanding and choices, not a quiet or compliant child. Asking “why?”, saying no to touch and disagreeing in words are skills to welcome.
  • Visual stories help many children and not every child. Adapt, skip or change any page. This is an educational resource, not therapy or medical advice.