Mistakes

I lost the game

What happened

A finished board game with the other player's counter at the end

You played a board game. Somebody else got to the end first.

What do you want to happen?

For the grown-up

This is not a lesson about winning and losing. She wanted to win, and that wanting is the whole of it. What is actually left is the next game, so offer that rather than a talk about being fair.

Say what they wanted before you say what can happen. A child who is handed a solution first hears it as being told off.
The true thing beats the soothing thing. “The cup is in the wash” is something a child can be disappointed about and then get past.
Wanting the impossible thing is not a mistake. It is what they want, and this resource agrees with them before it says anything else.
It works far better on a calm day than in the middle of one. Going through it when nothing is happening is what makes the words available the next time something is.

This is a rehearsal tool, not an assessment, and it does not know your child. You decide whether what it says fits them — if a scenario is not right, close it and pick another.

You played a board game. Somebody else got to the end first.

What do you want to happen?

Have won instead — You really wanted to be the one who won.
Have that game again from the start — You want to play the whole thing again.
Not play any more — You'd had enough of games for now.
Be angry about it — You're allowed to be angry about losing.

The game has already finished. But what happens next is still open.

What can we do now?

Play another game — Yes. The counters go back to the start for everybody.
Ask to play again — Good idea. Asking is how the next game gets started. You could say: “Can we play one more game?”
Put the game away — Okay. The box can go back on the shelf for now.

Somebody else won this one. The next game hasn't been played yet.

For the grown-up: This is not a lesson about winning and losing. She wanted to win, and that wanting is the whole of it. What is actually left is the next game, so offer that rather than a talk about being fair.

All 33 situations