Things ending

My friend is going home

What happened

A friend at the front door with their coat on

Your friend came to play. Now it's time for them to go home.

What do you want to happen?

For the grown-up

A person leaving is a different loss from a toy being put away, and the goodbye is worth slowing down for rather than hurrying past. Let her do it herself: a wave at the door gives the afternoon an ending she took part in, instead of one that happened to her.

Say what they wanted before you say what can happen. A child who is handed a solution first hears it as being told off.
The true thing beats the soothing thing. “The cup is in the wash” is something a child can be disappointed about and then get past.
Wanting the impossible thing is not a mistake. It is what they want, and this resource agrees with them before it says anything else.
It works far better on a calm day than in the middle of one. Going through it when nothing is happening is what makes the words available the next time something is.

This is a rehearsal tool, not an assessment, and it does not know your child. You decide whether what it says fits them — if a scenario is not right, close it and pick another.

Your friend came to play. Now it's time for them to go home.

What do you want to happen?

Make my friend stay — You wanted your friend to stay much longer.
Finish our game first — You wanted to get to the end together.
Ask when they can come again — You'd like to know when you can play again.
Not say goodbye — You'd rather not do the goodbye part at all.

Your friend has to go home now. But you can still say goodbye.

What can we do now?

Wave goodbye at the door — Yes. A goodbye is a real thing you get to do. You could say: “Bye! Thanks for coming to play.”
Ask when they can come — Good idea. Their grown-up knows what the days look like. You could say: “When can my friend come round again?”
Walk them to the door — Okay. The last bit of the playing is the walk out.

Your friend went home. You got to say goodbye properly.

For the grown-up: A person leaving is a different loss from a toy being put away, and the goodbye is worth slowing down for rather than hurrying past. Let her do it herself: a wave at the door gives the afternoon an ending she took part in, instead of one that happened to her.

All 33 situations